self improvement motivation

How to Deal With Rejection

How to Channel That Lousy Feeling

how_to_deal_with_rejection So you want to know how to deal with rejection? It's not a pleasant experience; however, you need to start by understanding that not all rejection is made equal. Often times, rejection is internalized and personalized to the point where it is difficult to see past the negative emotions being experienced.

Try to control an instant emotional reaction. This is difficult, because rejection is painful. Often, our mind and body attempts to protect us. Usually rejection is met with defensiveness, dejection, upset, anger, or many other emotionally intense feelings. Handling yourself well under such circumstance is not easy and you definitely do not want to place yourself at a further disadvantage.





Here Are Your Goals:

  • If possible, use the experience to your advantage.
  • Walk away with dignity, pride, and respect.
  • Leave a favorable impression from an unfavorable situation, because you never know how it will benefit you in the future.

Make Your Move

  • Try to avoid an emotionally charged response by taking several deep breaths and counting slowly to ten before responding. Or, try pretending you are observing yourself in a movie. Hopefully, this will keep some of the emotions at bay to allow you a minute to regain your composure so you can think objectively.
  • If you find that you cannot control your negative emotional response simply say "thank you" and leave. Give yourself time to regroup. The goal is to allow yourself to view the situation objectively. You cannot do this effectively if you are upset. Therefore, it is always better to remove yourself from a situation instead of potentially making it worse.

Assess the Situation Objectively

How to deal with rejection depends on the reason for the denial. You have to consider three things in your assessment: the source, the situation, and your actions or behaviors.

You will notice it says to assess your actions and/or behaviors. These are usually the drivers of rejection - not simply YOU as a person. This is where you must learn to focus on the specifics of what you did or said or didn't do or didn't say. Sometimes, you simply place yourself in a situation that is not a good fit for your talents and skills. Or, you simply may not be compatiable with the person you were dating who decided to end things. While you may not realize it; at times, rejection can be a positive for you in the longer-run.

How to Deal With Rejection the Smart Way? Take the Positive Lessons From the Situation and Use Them

You always have the power and ability to make changes. Try to view rejection as a form of feedback that, with time, you can learn and grow from. You have the power to find the positives from a negative experience to improve your life. So, the next time you are turned away or denied something remember the experience is meant to test your mettle. Always remember that nothing worthwhile comes easy.

There is a reason why those that experience success in life are persistent. When you want something bad enough, being rejected will spur you to find better, more compatible options; encourage you to grow and get better; or cause you to give up. If you give up, then maybe that something was not for you in the first place?

See how to deal with rejection? Use it to take stock of the situation. Do not react to rejection, respond to it. There are many people who use it as a stepping stone for achievement. Need examples? Lucille Ball, Michael Jordan, The Beatles, Barack Obama, Oprah Winfrey, Mel Gibson, Tiger Woods, Abraham Lincoln and the list goes on.

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